02: Advice on Life in the Pandemic – Dealing with Depression, Relationships, & Becoming Sober Curious
No one expected to live through a pandemic. We have spent a lot of time discussing our physical health, but in this episode, Amanda dives into how the pandemic has impacted our mental health.
This post contains affiliate links to some of my favorite tools and resources. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Full terms & conditions here.
In this episode, Amanda answers questions about:
Dealing with feeling depressed
Being in a relationship while quarantining
Becoming sober curious
Episode References:
Question 1
During the episode, Amanda does a grounding exercise, which can be found at 12:55
Question 2
Books Mentioned
Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix & Helen LaKelly Hunt
The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts by Gary Chapman
Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie
Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel:
Free Resource Corner
EFT Tapping (Emotional Freedom Technique)
Here are some tapping videos on YouTube:
Timestamps:
0:00 Intro
2:57 Listener Question 1
17:12 Listener Question 2
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This podcast was transcribed by an AI tool called Otter. Please forgive any typos or errors.
Amanda Durocher 0:02
Welcome to New View Advice, a safe place for you to ask your most vulnerable questions about life, relationships, healing, and so much more. I'm your host, Amanda Durocher, and I believe our fears and traumas are often what holds us back from living life to the fullest. Join me here each week as I offer advice on how to move through whatever is holding you back from being your best self. Let's get started.
Amanda Durocher 0:27
Hi, welcome to New View Advice. I'm your host, Amanda Durocher. And I am so excited to be jumping off. It's the second episode, but it's really feels like the first episode to me because it's the first episode where I get to answer listener questions, which is why I'm doing this. So I'm super excited. Today's topic is life in the pandemic. And I know you might be thinking, oh my god, seriously, I can't hear about the pandemic anymore. I can't discuss this anymore. I have heard talked about this, watch the videos. Why can't I escape this pandemic? I often feel the same. But I received a few questions that I thought would be really helpful for a lot of people. I know that I related to these questions. And I think that we've spent a lot of time in the past year discussing our physical health, but not as much time discussing our mental health. So I want to offer you a new view on some situations that you may be able to relate to. So I just want to take a quick minute before I dive into the questions to just say that, you know, the past year has been a hell of a year. No matter where you are in the world, you are affected by this pandemic. This was a global pandemic that created global lock downs. And it was impossible not to be affected. So over this past year, so many people experienced unexpected life changes. I think everybody did. Nobody was planning on this. This was the nobody's 2020 Like New Year's resolution. So it's brought up a lot of feelings and a lot of fears. And I think the past year forced a lot of people to think about the life they were living in a way they hadn't before because they didn't have their normal distractions. So I just want to honor wherever you're at, however you're feeling. I think the majority of people did not have the best year ever. I think the majority of people had a pretty tough year. And I just want to honor that it was a tough year for a lot of people. You're not alone. You're not alone in how you're feeling. So I think we're given an opportunity to sit with our feelings, to sit with ourselves to get to know ourselves a little better. And that's what this podcast is about is about me helping you get back in touch with you. The questions I chose, I think are relatable to a lot of people right now. They deal with feeling depressed relationships, living with your partner, 24/7 and alcohol substances. So let's jump on it.
Amanda Durocher [Listener Question] 3:02
Question one, Dear New View Advice. I'm 24 and have been having a very hard time this past year, I was laid off from my job and had to move home with my parents because of the pandemic. I feel very isolated. Most of my friends friends is in quotes I haven't spoken to in months, my mood swings go from up to down. But mostly I feel depressed. And since life does not seem to be getting better. I feel very discouraged. I thought I was on a path to success, my own place a good job and lots of friends to go out with. Now I don't know how or when I will get back on track when I don't even want to get out of bed in the morning. What would you do? Thank you so much for your raw, honest vulnerability with this question. I think that so many people are feeling this way. So thank you for writing this in. I think a lot of people can relate to how you're feeling right now. I just want to honor how hard of a time this has been. I see you. This has been a rough year. And I am so sorry for how it's affected you. I'm so sorry. You lost your job, or you were laid off. I'm so sorry. You had to move home. And life's not what you expected. It's not fair. This whole year has not been fair. And I'm so sorry. You're feeling so depressed, and you're feeling discouraged. Those are very common feelings right now. But I want you to know that your feelings are valid. I think that I just want to say don't be so hard on yourself. I think your mood swings are totally normal. Right now, I read this New York Times article recently about languishing, which I'm paraphrasing here, but it's the emotion between depression and motivation, like being unmotivated, like just feeling blah, and meth. And that is so common right now. So I just want you to know that. I don't know if you're feeling depressed before this, and we can talk about that a little bit. I'm not really sure of your circumstance. But if this is just a feeling you've just started having. I think so many people can relate It's how you're feeling. So if you're feeling alone right now, I just want to reassure you, you are not alone. You are not different. You're not weird. There's nothing wrong with you. And I honor how you don't want to get out of bed in the morning. Those are real feelings. You know, I think the other feelings behind that are hopelessness and helplessness. I think a lot of people feel pretty hopeless right now. And a lot of people feel pretty helpless. And those are normal feelings. I mean, we're in a time where there's not much we can do to change the outside circumstances. So you can't change the fact you were laid off, and you can't change the fact you had to move home. Another word that's coming to mind is feeling like out of control. And I think so many people can relate to feeling out of control right now. And so many of us are coping strategies, is control. So I know for me, as a survivor of trauma, but I think so many people are survivors of trauma, that one of the biggest coping strategies is to control to control everything to control your schedule, to control other people to control what you do to control your work, to keep yourself busy. And we're in a time where we are so out of control. We're so out of control. It sounds like you have a lot of things that are out of control in your life. And I can see why that would be depressing, and why you would be discouraged. So I just want to take a minute to honor where you're at. I just want you to know you're right on track. You're right where you're supposed to be. I know it doesn't feel like that. But the whole world is going through this shutdown, lockdown, pandemic, quarantine, whatever word you want to use today. And you're right on track. So I know how isolating you feel. I just want to say that to everyone out there who's felt really isolated. During this time I see when I hear you. I think that this pandemic has had a toll on everyone's mental health. And I think we're going to see the effects of that after the pandemic. So I'm going to offer you some advice. But if some days you just need to lie in bed in the morning, that's okay. Don't overly press yourself. Because right now, we're going through a collective trauma, which just means there are so there's so much fear everywhere. And it's okay to take a day you're healing, we're healing from this collective trauma, we're learning what the new normal is going to be. And that takes time. So it's okay, if you can't get out of bed today, I'm going to give you some questions and some things to reflect on. And if you need help, if you're feeling really depressed, I would recommend finding a therapist to speak with weakly. I've always used Psychology Today to find my therapist. I'll link that in the show notes. But you can call your insurance or Google just Google therapists in your area. I think talking to somebody can really help when we're depressed because we get so stuck in our heads and in our own worlds. And I can really help to talk to someone. Also, if you're not comfortable in your house virtual therapy, I'm currently doing virtual therapy. I love it. I see my therapist weekly. It's amazing. It really helps me just to stay grounded. I also think therapy is really great right now because we are also disconnected. And we're not seeing people as much as we used to. So having a safe space to return to each week is so comforting. So I would if you're feeling really depressed, recommend a therapist if you don't already have one. So for you, I'm wondering if there's one area of your life you can focus on like one area of your life you want to change? I think so much has happened for you in the past year, as with so many people that I think what could help you is focusing on one area of your life. So do you want to focus on finding a new job? Do you want to focus on friendships? Do you want to focus on finding a hobby? Do you want to focus on self love and self care? I think you should pick one thing and focus on it. So for you, I think implementing some self care practices would be great. You're stuck in a cycle, and probably in some thought patterns that aren't very nice to yourself. So one thing that I would recommend for you is to implement a morning routine. Or if you're really not doing anything, just a day routine. So find 15 minutes a day to dedicate to self care. So some ideas I have for you. One would be to write a gratitude list every morning. Wake up pen and paper next to your bed. Since you don't want to get out of bed. You don't even have to get out of bed for this and just write 10 things you're grateful for. And it could be as simple as I'm grateful I don't have to get out of bed today. I'm grateful for my heartbeat. I'm grateful for this body. It may be you have something exciting that happens that day. But if you struggle just look around your rule like what are you thankful for? I'm thankful for this comfy blanket. I'm thankful that I have food for breakfast, I think you will find that starting to do that daily. Daily, I'm going to stress that these are practices that need to be implemented. And you'll find change over time. That by implementing that daily, your perspective will start to shift, you will start to look for things you are grateful for in your every day. Another idea I have for you is meditation. There are so many free apps at this point for meditation. And for you, if you don't meditate, don't just try to sit there and do nothing. Find a guided meditation, so many people are like, I can't meditate. But honestly, again, if you're having trouble getting out of bed in the morning, when you wake up, open Insight Timer, that's the one I use. There's plenty of other ones, I'll link them in the show notes. And just find a self love meditation or gratitude meditation, and just listen. That's all you have to do. Close your eyes, and breathe. Come back into your body. I love it. Also for the isolation, I know it can be hard when you're depressed. But I would reach out to someone, I don't know your relationship with these friends. I don't know if you're in your head, and you think they don't want to be your friend anymore. Or if you think they don't care, and they don't want to talk to you. But if there's somebody you miss in your life reach out, I think you'll find that a lot of people aren't reaching out because they feel the same. They're feeling isolated to they think they're sick of zoom calls for the day. And then they get on with a friend. And they're like, oh, wait, that was better than I thought I should. And I'm like that. I'm like, oh my god, I have this thing tonight, with my friends on Zoom, I already zoom today. But then I get on and I feel better. Or if you don't want to zoom, because you want to stay in bed. Because I'm a fan of my bed too. I'm not asking you to get out of bed, pick up the phone call someone, don't just text call, here's somebody's voice. And if you really don't want to talk to any of your friends, because you've realized you don't have a lot to talk about, are you realized that your relationships were more superficial than you ever thought, then I would recommend getting a therapist. It is a safe space weekly to talk to somebody. It's just a safe space to connect. You are not alone. But if you're feeling depressed, you need to talk about it. You do not have to suffer alone. Depression is like a silent killer. We suffer alone, we don't talk about it. I'm not sure where you live. But I also recommend getting out of the house. So I don't know your relationship with your parents. But if you're close with your mom or your dad, just ask them if they want to go on a walk with you. I think part of this depression we're all feeling so many of us are is not leaving our house, I know that my partner and I will get cooped up for days. And then we'll go out and we'll be like, Oh my God, I feel so much better. So I want to do something with you real quick. If you're able to. If you're working or driving, please don't do this while you're driving. You can come back to this later. But I want to offer this technique that you can do now or at any time really to come back to yourself when you start to feel overwhelmed, anxious, depressed, discouraged, out of control, any sort of heavy emotion. I want you to close your eyes. I want you to place both your hands on your heart and I want you to drop your awareness into your heart. So a lot of us our awareness is often in our heads and I want you take your focus and focus on your chest on the rise and fall of your breath.
And I want you to breathe in and breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.
It I want you to repeat after me. I am safe I am safe in this present moment. It is safe for me to have all my feelings in this present moment I honor and name your feeling. I honor this feeling it has been a really hard here I see how hard of a year this has been for me. It is safe for me to have all my feelings about it. And I am safe in this present moment. This feeling may be hard. But I can do hard things. And this too shall pass. I am safe. I am so safe in this present moment. And I love myself. I love myself exactly as I am right now. I love myself and my imperfectness I love all my flaws. I love all my strengths. I love my body. I love myself. And I accept where I'm at right now. I honor myself. I love yourself. And I want you to breathe in. Breathe out. I want you to open your eyes. And if you weren't able to join us on that exercise, this recording will always be there for you. What was that? Three minutes tops. That is a way for you to ground yourself back to the present moment. Our minds often run out of control with thoughts. And it is important for you to find ways to ground yourself. So that is a way I use daily, just assuring myself how safe I am. So I hope that helped. I hope something in this answer helped you. And if you have any more questions, please let me know. Thank you for right again. That was such a great question.
Amanda Durocher [Listener Question] 17:18
So let's jump into question two. Dear New View Advice, I moved in with my boyfriend a year ago, right at the beginning of the pandemic. I thought we were headed for marriage. But over the past year, we've been forced to spend a lot of time together. And I'm not sure he's the one. I love him. But the spark is missing. I find him getting really bored of him. And this irritates me. We used to go on dates. Now we just sit at home. Yes, we're supposed to stay at home. But isn't love supposed to be exciting and filled with romance like in the movies? can't help wondering if I'm settling. I can't decide if this is only because of the pandemic or if I should leave any advice. Sincerely, is he the one? Wow, what a juicy question. Let's dive right into this one. Okay, I'm going to start with the part that said isn't love supposed to be like the movies? Now? There's your answer. No, that's one thing I can give you for sure. Everything else is going to have to be you figuring this out. I can only guide you with some questions. But I can debunk that for you. Love is not like the movies. I don't know how many people out there need to hear that. It is not like the movies, real relationships, or work. And that's okay. First, I want you to ask yourself, I want you to ask yourself, What are you doing to bring romance to this relationship? What are you doing to bring a spark to the relationship? In real life, you're in an equal partnership, or you should be. And it is just as much your responsibility to bring romance to this relationship as it is your partners. And then I also challenge you to ask yourself what is really bothering you about this relationship? Is it just the lack of romance? Or is there something else that you feel like is missing? Have you gotten bored in relationships before because if this has been the same reason you have left other relationships, that's a red flag for you to look at. If you often get bored, then that's something you need to look at. That's not going to be your partner. If this has happened before. You need to start looking at your patterns in relationships, relationships are a great way for us to look at where we need to be healing. There's this book about relationships called getting the love you want. Which if you're in a rut I recommend. So it's basically you go through like a 12 week program with your partner where you you basically learn why you're triggering each other and that goes back to your Margo and your Margo is a mix of your parents. So I don't know if this is a new concept for anybody but many of the people we date, I would say 100% of the people we date are a reflection of our parents. So it's a reflection of the good characteristics of our parents and a bad characteristics are our parents, that's a little harsh of the not so nice ones. And we date people, this is a brain thing, if you read the book, it goes into the brain science. I'm not a sciency person, so that stuff never sticks. But I do know it does what the brain does with the reptilian brain. And we date people who remind us of our childhood wounds. I don't know if this is new for anybody. So I'm gonna say it slowly. We date people who reflect our childhood wounds, in order to heal those childhood wounds. And to repeat that we date people who reflect back to us our childhood wounds, so we can heal from those childhood wounds. So if you had a father who is absent, is very likely you will attract a partner who can be absent. If you had a mother, who was very critical, it is very likely that you will attract a partner who is very critical of you. And this is because there's the science part. But the part that I talked about is there is a wounded inner child within you, those emotions from those experiences are trapped in your body until you heal them. So I am a huge believer that before we leave our partners, we need to really ask ourselves, is this them? Or is this me, I believe a lot of the times it is us, if we are unsure of leaving, if it is our partner, like if you're in an abusive relationship, or there's just like no chemistry anymore, you may have to leave. But often times we leave when it gets hard. Because the world has taught us that life isn't hard. And if you quote the movies, the movies show us that love is romantic, filled with big gestures like on The Bachelor. And the truth is, Relationships are hard. It's hard to live with someone else. Sometimes it's fantastic. Sometimes it's not. And it's your work to see if that is them are you. So I think you should try to initiate romance. Before deciding if you should leave I think leaving is the last case scenario. If you were planning on marrying this guy, it sounds like you're in love with him. It just sounds like you might be in a bit of a rut, which I think so many relationships hit this year, because nobody's meant to spend 24/7 with their partner to unhealthy. But we've all had to learn ways to do it. Also, if you are in a relationship, especially a long term relationship, you should be cultivating a place a safe space for you to talk about your feelings. And that's not hippie dippie. That's like long term relationship stuff. So you and your partner might naturally do this, or my partner and I have we call it trust tree Tuesday. And every Tuesday, it's not always on Tuesday. But we get together and we create a safe space to talk about things that are up for us like things that bothered us or things we want more of, or things we want to talk about with each other a safe space, because if you ahead of time, set that time aside, then it if you can both emotionally prepare for the other person may be giving you some constructive feedback, because it's really hard when your partner is like I wish you were doing more of this. So that cultivates a safe space for you both to talk about that. Because if you don't feel safe enough telling your partner you want more romance, that's already a problem. And a way to cultivate that could be broaching the idea of having a time where you can come and talk about your issues. Long term communication is so important. So implementing structures for that communication. So what did I have, I want you to initiate, I want you to create a safe space for communication. I also think if you're struggling and you're committed to this relationship, you and your partner could read one of these books. If you haven't read a self help book, I think that, like I said, relationships are work. So creating an environment. And learning and growing together is important. If you're going to be together forever. If you're you said you're planning on marrying this guy at one point, that's forever. The goal of marriage is to be together forever, then you guys should be trying to grow together and bite and to do that I would recommend. I mean my partner and I read self help books together sometimes. And I find that really helps because then you both have the language to talk about it. And it doesn't feel so attack oriented, because you're just discussing these concepts in a safe way. So initiate create communication. Maybe read a self help book tailor oh and for if you are feeling like you're spending too much time together communicate about boundaries. I already know that we are going to be discussing boundaries a lot on this show. But I think that maybe you're bored of him because you're spending too much time together. Do you guys have any just you time? Even if you're not leaving the house, can you go on a walk by yourself? Can you put yourself in the room and he watched TV at night and you do something else, you shouldn't be spending all your time together. If you're, if that works for you and your partner, that's great. But if you're bored, I'm gonna guess it's not working for you. So I think you need to cultivate a little bit more self time. And I think that will help bring the romance, because you won't be together all the time. So to sum that up, I recommend initiating the romance. And making sure that you're bringing romance to this relationship to it is not just your partner's responsibility to communicating about what you want communicating about your needs. I know this can be really hard when you haven't done it yet. But like I mentioned, I think carving out a safe time, maybe once a week, maybe every other week, maybe once a month, to discuss these things with your partner is a great step for a healthy long relationship. Three, reading a self help book together, learning to grow together, I don't know your age. So I don't know how many long term relationships you've been in. But I think that a lot of us just think we're gonna like wing it with relationships. No, you have to learn, you have to learn how to be in a relationship. We are not taught in school, a lot of us had parents that exemplified unhealthy marriages, or a lot of us have divorced parents. So that's not a good model for how to be in a long term relationship, right? And so we need to learn those skills on our own. You know, that's the world we live in. So you and your partner need to dedicate some time to that. And that's okay. Everybody has to do it. I think it's one of those myths so that we'll just figure it out how to be in a relationship. No, no, no. You need to learn. You try new things. It's uncomfortable, but it's totally possible. There's tons of resources out there. I'll link them in the show notes but getting the love you want and amazing read The Five Love Languages is is an amazing read. Codependency no more is an amazing read for couples. And there's an Esther Perel book. That's really good, too. I can't remember the title, but I'll link it in the show notes. And Esther Perel is amazing. So if you are interested in relationship advice, she has an amazing podcast called, where should we begin. And you can just search the descriptions and see if any of the descriptions are like your relationship. If you haven't heard, where should we begin it's been, it's like probably five years old or something. But she does couples therapy sessions on the podcast. So helpful, so informative. So I recommend that and then four, I recommend for you cultivating you time and him cultivating him time. So I know the world is starting to reopen. So you could probably leave your house more depending on where you are in the world and in the United States. But even in your own home, spending time apart. So when you come together, you have things to talk about. And you're more excited to see each other. I think it's easy to lose the spark. If you're just always with each other. I hope some of these tools and tips help for you. And for anybody who's been in the pandemic living with a partner, it's definitely not normal to spend this much time with somebody. So if problems have arose in your relationship, that's totally normal. And I totally relate to that. And I see you, I feel you. And yeah, please let me know if any of that helped. And thank you so much for your question.
Amanda Durocher [Listener Question] 28:46
Dear New View Advice I have found over the past year during the pandemic, my drinking has increased immensely. What used to be my weekend routine and occasional Wine Wednesday with the girls has turned into a nightly thing. I wouldn't say I'm getting hammered every night, but I'm drinking more than usual. I know we are in a pandemic. And I keep seeing other people drinking more. And I talked to my friends and they all feel the same and say it's normal. But I don't know. I find myself wondering if I have a problem. Maybe when life goes back to normal my drinking well to sincerely wine o'clock. Thank you for this question. I think this is such a hot topic right now I've read that the amount of people drinking has gone up during the pandemic and also the amount of people who have chosen to go sober. Is that so? Thank you for such a vulnerable question. My advice for you is to start being curious about your relationship with alcohol. I don't think you need to label yourself an alcoholic. I don't think you need to label yourself a problem drinker. I think you need to become curious about your relationship with alcohol. I think you need to start asking yourself when do you pick up a drink and why? So the next time you go to pick up a drink, I would ask myself, why am I drinking? Keep asking? How do I feel right now? And I would challenge you not to pick up a drink for a week, see how it feels, see if you're able to do that. And for other listeners, if you can't relate to having a problem with alcohol, I would ask you to substitute alcohol with whatever you use to check out from the present moment. So what I mean by that is what you use to numb yourself. So that's what a lot of us use alcohol for, it's to numb how we're really feeling. So if you're an anxious person, and you drink, you're numbing the anxiety, or you're trying to numb the depression, or you're trying to numb the boredom. And people use marijuana for this. People used to work for this. People use reading somebody's love novels for this, you know, that's a way to check out of your relationship to escape into another world, right? So we use alcohol for escapism, and we use other substances as well. So if you don't relate to alcohol, I think 90% of people check out from the present reality. I mean, if you have a cell phone, and you're spending a lot of time on it, you're checking out. So I would get curious about what you're using to numb and how that is affecting you. So we all use things to numb. The question is, how is that affecting us? So I gave up alcohol a few months ago, and I have never felt better. So I'm a huge fan of sobriety. I'm doing 12 months sober, and then I'm going to assess if I'm ever going to pick up a drink again. But I can tell you that it's been the best three months of my life. So I don't see myself going back. But before I went sober, I became really clear on why I was drinking, I became really curious about why I picked up a drink. So I would challenge you, if you are drinking, and you're finding it to be a problem. Like, are you waking up hungover in the mornings? Are you not doing everything you want to do? Or you're not feeling great? Then I would suggest that you may be thinking about, well, one, why am I drinking? What feeling? Am I trying to mask? Or am I drinking out of pressure? Am I in a social situation? I'm just drinking because everyone else's? Do I actually want this drink? And then I would ask yourself, if there's something else you could do to check out, I would also ask yourself if there's something you're not doing in your life, and just become curious about it. And if it partially relates to alcohol, I asked that because before I stopped drinking, I was like, why can't I get myself to write every day. I'm a writer, I love writing, but I couldn't get myself to write every day. And then I gave up alcohol. And I realized the brain fog from booze was causing me not to write was causing me not to get into my creative flow. But I didn't correlate that until after I stopped drinking. And I would also ask yourself, What's your relationship with alcohol? How do you feel the day after you drink? Because it sounds like you're asking yourself, do I have a problem? So it sounds like you're judging your drinking, which to me, means you're giving yourself self hating thoughts. You're not being nice to yourself when you drink. That was a big reason why I stopped drinking. I, every time I woke up after I drank I had shame. Like I felt shame for drinking, because I wasn't doing anything with my life. And I was just drinking is what it felt like. So I felt shame around that we all have to stop the self hating thoughts. So the behaviors that are creating the shameful thoughts are these thoughts that make us hate ourselves? The way I would word it is any thought against yourself is a thought to many, your number one job in this world is to love yourself. For me, it really just comes down to if alcohol is causing you not to love yourself, then it's time to re examine your relationship with it. And I'm not telling you to give it up. There are so many Instagram accounts, books, resources about sobriety, or about, like a big movement right now is being sober, curious. And to me it sounds like you might be sober, curious, and super curious. Just being curious about sobriety, like, Oh, I've been doing this pattern for so long. What would it be like without it? So I think instead of asking yourself, will my drinking go back to normal? After the pandemic, I would ask yourself about the present moment. You can't control the future that just causes anxiety. One of my favorite expressions I forgot who said it is depression is living in the past anxiety is living in the future. We got to live in the present moment. So I think you need to get curious not about your past drinking behaviors, not about your future, but about how you're drinking right now. And why? And very likely it will do with the past. And ask yourself what you're so afraid of what's sobriety? What is alcohol give you that sobriety does not just get really curious. Don't judge yourself. Don't be like I think I have a problem. To me. It sounds like you're just judging yourself and maybe it is time for you to go sober because alcohol is not giving you what it wants dip or it's not making you happy. You think it makes you happy. But then the repercussions after you drink or you're not happy? Only you can answer those questions. I found it wasn't worth it. But maybe it is for you. I No, no. I would love to talk about addiction sobriety on future episodes. But I think for this question, I'm just gonna leave it here. Thank you so much for your question. That was a really vulnerable conversation. And I hope it helps. And please let me know if you have any more questions.
Amanda Durocher [outro] 35:20
So the final segment of the show, I haven't decided the name of this yet. Right now, I'm just going to call it free resource corner is each episode each week, I'm going to offer you a free resource, something that you can do right now, today, tomorrow to help you with the topic. So today's topic was life in the pandemic. So the resource I came up with was EFT tapping. So that's called Emotional Freedom Technique. And I don't know if you've heard of it before. But if T is used to reduce negative feelings you're currently experiencing in just a few minutes. So it's by tapping specific meridian points in your body. And I've used EFT for years, I discovered this in group therapy, and it's changed my life. So I thought I'd offer it to you, when I feel a very strong emotion, I definitely go back to EFT all the time. So you can do this in five to 10 minutes. I recommend Brad Yates tapping videos, this guy is like the tapping guru. He has a million videos on YouTube, and he just shows you what to do. He does it with you. And the videos are five to 10 minutes, and I use his videos. I've used other people's videos, but Brad Yates has a million videos. So I highly recommend him. I'm gonna link it in the show notes. So I recommend checking him out on YouTube. And so it can be emotions like anxiety, stress, panic, I'm going to link a few videos. So I'm going to link one to anxiety and also one that he created for quarantine and isolation. So I thought that one was really interesting and relevant for this episode. So I hope that helps. I'll also create an EFT tapping video on my Tiktok. And I'll put it up for you guys to see me tapping. But let me know if tapping helps. Let me know if you've heard of tapping. Let me know if you have more questions about it. I gave a very quick explanation. So thank you for joining me for another episode of New View Advice. For a chance to have your question answered in a future episode. Feel free to email me at newviewadvice@gmail.com submit through my website www.newviewadvice.com or reach out to me via Instagram or Tiktok at @newviewadvice. I will link all those ways to submit questions in the show notes. I created this podcast because I want to help listeners like you. So please let me know what you found helpful, and what kind of topics you'd like to hear in the future. To view the complete show notes and all the links and resources mentioned in today's episode, you can visit my website at www.newviewadvice.com. And I just want to say I'm so grateful to be sharing this space with you. If you're a fan of today's episode, I'd love to ask you to consider leaving a review. Reviews really do matter for helping other people find this podcast and allowing me to continue to create more content for you in the future. So thank you again for joining me Amanda Durocher for another episode of New View Advice. As always, I am so grateful to be here with you and to offer a new view on whatever you may be going through. See you next time.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
